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Positive steps to wellbeing

Written by on February 14, 2019

Recently, I had a bit of a wobble in my fight with anxiety when it returned at a time when I was struggling with my self-worth. Why was my partner with me? What did she see in me? Was I in a relationship just to be in a relationship? Questions I was asking myself that I couldn’t answer. Thankfully, my partner knows I sometimes feel this way and was there to reassure me. I was lucky. When we don’t have a partner for support there are several ways to help regain our self-worth and increase our well being.

Be kind to yourself

Our culture, genes, upbringing, education, gender, sexuality, beliefs and life experiences make us who we are. We all have bad days. Be kind to yourself. Encourage, rather than criticise yourself. Treat yourself the way you would treat a friend if they were in the same situation,

Take up a new hobby and/or learn a new skill.

Increase your confidence and interest, meet others, or prepare to find, or change jobs.

Help others

Get involved with a community project, charity work, or simply help out someone you know. As well as benefitting others, you will be doing something worthwhile, which will help you feel better about yourself..

Eat healthily

Eat regularly, eat breakfast, eat healthily, eat fruit and vegetables, drink water, avoid highly processed foods that give you a quick fill but do not give you any nutrients.

Connect with others

Stay in touch with family and friends – make regular and frequent contact with them. Human interaction is key.

Exercise regularly

Being active helps lift our mood, reduces stress and anxiety, improves physical health and gives us more energy. Get outside, get into nature, ideally in a green space or around water, Woodland is a personal favourite of mine. Just wandering through some woods gives me a great sense of serenity and also brings back good memories of my childhood when I used to spend holidays building and sleeping in dens with friends. Find an activity you enjoy doing and just go for it!


Make time for yourself. Allow yourself to chill out and relax. Find something that suits you. Different things work for different people. Breathe… be mindful of your breathing. Imagine a balloon in your stomach inflating and deflating as you breathe in and out.

Balance sleep

Get into a healthy, regular sleep routine. Go to bed and getting up at the same time each day. Avoid caffeine or any sort of stimulus a couple of hours before bed. Keep a book or magazine by your bed to relax your brain before sleep.

See the bigger picture

We all give different meanings to situations and see things from our own point of view. Broaden your perspective and consider the bigger picture. A good thing to do is to try and see a different point of view from your own in any situation where you may be getting frustrated or wound up. Think to yourself, what meaning am I giving this? Is this fact, or opinion? How would others see it? Is there another way of looking at this? How important is it, or will it be important a year from now? What can I do right now that will help the most?

Accepting: “It is as it is”

We tend to fight against distressing thoughts and feelings, but we can learn to just notice them and give up that struggle. Some situations we just can’t change. We can surf those waves rather than try to stop them. Allow any negative thoughts and sensations just to be – they will pass.

Above all, always try to keep a positive mental attitude (PMA).

“Don’t care what they may say, we got that attitude!
Don’t care what you may do, we got that attitude!

Hey, we got that P.M.A.! Hey, we got the P.M.A.!”

(Bad Brains – Attitude)

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